Friday, September 18, 2009

And in the news today...

3 Undergraduates of the University of Abuja got arrested for attempted Kidnapping of 2 Federal Ministers. Prince Adetokunbo Kayode and Dr.Sam Egwu. (What's up with all these guys and Titles sef?)
Ransom Money: 300 Million Naira.
and err... a signed promise by the Federal Government to end the ASUU strike.

The Inspector General of Police says he's not aware Mallam Nuhu Ribadu was in Nigeria for Late Gani Fawehinmi's Funeral.
He's asking the good citizens of Nigeria to send him pictures of Ribadu in Nigeria. Then he'll believe.
Apparently the Chief Security officer of the country does not read the papers, or pics in the Newspapers were photoshopped. lol.
I'm not even going to say nothing about this one. I love crisp, fresh linen Sheets on my bed, Air-conditioning, Play station 3, Blueberry Cheesecakes.... none of these can be gotten from a Nigerian Prison. Nuff said.

There's Bank holiday on Monday and Tuesday. Yay!!!!! For the first time, I wanna hug every Muslim in sight.
That's one helluva long ass weekend man.

The US Govt has thrown out the appointment of the Nigerian ambassador Tunde Adeniran.
Looks like he's got a naughty son who can't seem to stay out of trouble.
The Nigerian government are busy begging the Yanks to re-consider. Shebi na the pickin cause wahala not Baba 'Damola! It's just small Ogbanje that is worrying the boy now! Haba! You sef no get pickin?
Adedamola Adeniran is facing charges for multiple Gang rape, and has a previous criminal record for Car theft and Credit card Identity theft.

Now my personal favorite news of the day. Wait for this, this takes the biscuit
2 Men, Okechukwu Kenneth Enyinnaya and Samson Nwachukwu sat down under the Mango tree in front of Okechukwu’s house one lazy Sunday Afternoon and
Dreamed up their own version of the classic Kidnap extortion plan.
Hey everyone else is doing it right? So why can’t we?
So they got the number of a Spaghetti eating Italian expat dude living in Abuja, loaded up 500 naira worth of Glo Airtime Credits from the Mallam next door on credit..pun Intended, and then rang up Luigi. Listen up mate, We’re Assasins. Pay 1.2 Million Naira or we’ll come turn off your bloody lights mate!
Luigi says ok give me your account number and I’ll wire the money into it.
Dumb and Dumber did just that. Lol. They texted him their account details and strolled off to the Closest Branch to their Mango tree hang out to pick up the cash.
Luigi is back home eating Spaghetti and having a laugh with Mario.
Tweedledee and Tweedledum just broke the Naija record for daftest crime ever.
And their sorry butts are in Jail. Stupid fucks.


NaijaBabe said...

Ok thats major funny stuff

The foolish dudes should have just said they wanted the strikes ended. ahn ahn. 300mill ko, their asses can smell 3mill in the first place. the 3oomill would then be their earnings for helping their fellow undergrads get back into school, cos I know they aint going back, having earned 15mill each.

Lucky you! We dont even get half a day..let alone 2. Its not even recognised, let alone dashed a holiday. May their MPs and lawmakers burn in hell for not giving us a holiday. Hiss..Foolishness!!! 2 FRIGGING DAYSSSSSS!!!!


Linen, I see you have eyes for good things! LOL, I dont think those exist in any prison mate!

Have a lovely LONG (hopefully boring) weekend!!!

I know, I'm hating! Allow me pls!

Adekunle Shobowale said...

Wetin i do you now? There is so much hate in your comment i feel like Kanye already.It's just 2 days holiday haba!

NaijaBabe said...

Cos you didnt fast for one day and you get 2 days off!!!

I dont want their frigging 2 days at christmas! I want it now!

LOL- Sorry, but you started it.

Beauty said...

It is unbelievable, things people do for money.

Elusive said...

just discovered your blog, cool stuff, will def check back.

Franklin said...

Nyc 1!



and then theres another holiday next tuesday, when naija turns 49 (speaking of which, a fool @ 49?.... i digress) and then theres another 2 days of public holiday in November for eid el kabir i think, u just gotta love naija! lol

ManCee said...

lol broda, lets attempt to ignore the charade that we call 'government' as Ps3 slim in naija prison o. Not even Atari console sef.

Those 2 wonkies should be hung by the balls...
Still lol

AlooFar said...

where are you?

Anonymous said...

you too do shakara.
you want me to start begging you again, abi?
come update this blog,i beg.